In the dance of life, a strong matrimony stands as a timeless duet, where two hearts move in unison, navigating the ebbs and flows of life’s melodies. It’s a journey of love, growth, and mutual discovery, where the bond of matrimony is not just a contract but a profound connection that evolves and deepens over time.

However, like any enduring partnership, research shows that relationships require dedication, understanding, and constant nurturing to keep their strength and vibrancy.

In this article, we delve into the essential aspects of sustaining a strong and successful marriage, exploring how couples can foster lasting love, respect, and companionship. From the art of communication to finding common interests to the dance of financial harmony, each element plays a crucial role in keeping a fulfilling and resilient marriage bond.

Communication Is Key

Effective communication is the cornerstone of any strong marriage. It’s more than just exchanging words; it’s about truly understanding and connecting with your partner. Active listening plays a crucial role in this process. It involves:

• Giving your full attention

• Understanding the underlying emotion
• Responding with empathy and compassion
• Truly caring for the well-being of the other person

Additionally, expressing your own needs and desires openly and respectfully is vital. It’s important to create a safe space where both partners feel heard and understood. Regularly checking in with each other, not only about day-to-day activities but also deeper feelings and dreams, helps maintain this vital connection so you can live happily together.

Trust is also one of the foundations of a secure and healthy relationship. Building and keeping trust requires consistent effort.

• Honesty And Transparency: Being honest and transparent in all aspects of the relationship helps in building a strong foundation of trust. This includes being open about feelings, thoughts, and concerns.
• Overcoming Jealousy: Jealousy can be detrimental to trust. Addressing insecurities openly, reassuring each other, and working on self-esteem issues can help in overcoming jealousy.
• Consistency And Reliability: Consistent behavior and reliability are key to building trust. This means keeping promises, being dependable, and showing up for each other in both big and small ways.

Of course, conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but it’s the approach to resolving disagreements that can either strengthen or weaken a bond. If you can repair your relationships with friends when things go awry, you can expect to do it with your partner too.

• Healthy Argument Techniques: It’s normal to disagree sometimes, so learning to argue healthily is crucial. This involves staying respectful, avoiding blame, listening actively, and trying to understand your partner’s perspective.
• Seeking Help When Needed: Sometimes, conflicts can be too complex to handle alone. Seeking help from a counselor or therapist can provide new insights and strategies for resolving disagreements.
• Compromise and Forgiveness: Compromise is often necessary in conflict resolution. It’s about finding a middle ground where both partners feel heard and valued. Equally important is the ability to forgive and move past conflicts without holding grudges in the future.

Mutual Respect And Understanding

Respect and understanding form the bedrock of a loving marriage. This means valuing each other’s opinions, even when they differ, and approaching disagreements with empathy rather than judgment. Mutual respect is also about acknowledging and appreciating each other’s unique qualities and contributions to the relationship. Understanding each other’s perspectives, especially during conflicts, can lead to more compassionate and effective problem-solving. It’s about seeing the point the other is trying to make and respecting each other not just as a partner but as an individual with their own thoughts, feelings, and experiences.

Time Together

Spending quality time together as a married couple is essential in keeping the marriage bond sturdy. This doesn’t necessarily mean grand gestures; even small, everyday moments can be significant. You can strengthen your connection by doing simple things like:

• Planning regular date nights

• Exploring new activities together

• Simply enjoying a quiet evening at home

• Sharing hobbies and interests

Quality time is about being fully present with each other, creating shared memories, and continuing to learn about each other’s evolving selves. It helps to remove distractions so you can focus on your beloved. This also includes physical and emotional intimacy. This intimacy goes beyond physical closeness; it’s about maintaining a deep emotional connection. Regular affectionate touch, from holding hands to hugging, reinforces this bond. Other partners might talk about things they love.

Keeping the spark alive in your relationship requires effort and creativity. This could involve romantic gestures, intimate conversations, or simply making time for each other. Emotional intimacy is nurtured by being vulnerable with each other, sharing fears, hopes, and dreams, and offering unwavering support and understanding.

Handling Stressors

External stressors such as work pressures, health concerns, or family dynamics can significantly impact matrimony. It’s essential for couples to develop techniques to manage these stressors effectively.

• Balancing Work and Family Life: Achieving a work-life balance is crucial. This may involve setting boundaries around work hours, making time for family activities, and supporting each other’s career goals while ensuring family life doesn’t take a backseat.
• Dealing with Extended Family: It can be challenging when you have to deal with extended family. It’s important to communicate openly with each other about family issues, set healthy boundaries, and present a united front when addressing concerns with relatives.
• Health and Wellness: Physical and mental health issues can affect matrimony. Being supportive, understanding, and proactive about health and wellness is key. This might mean encouraging healthy habits, being empathetic during health challenges, and seeking professional help when needed.

Financial Harmony

Financial issues can be a major source of stress in matrimony, so achieving financial harmony is crucial. This involves open and honest discussions about money, including budgeting, spending habits, and financial goals. Working together to create and stick to a budget can enhance teamwork and ensure you’re both working towards common objectives. It’s also important to respect each other’s financial perspectives and come to compromises that satisfy both partners. Regular financial check-ins can help keep you both on the same page and prevent misunderstandings or resentments from building up.

Growing Together

One of the most beautiful aspects of long-term marriage is the opportunity it provides for both partners to grow together. This growth is not just personal but also as a couple, continuously evolving and adapting to each other’s changing needs and aspirations.

Common Goals For Maintaining A Strong Matrimony

Setting common goals is a key aspect of growing together. These goals could range from short-term objectives like planning a vacation or a home renovation project, to long-term aspirations such as:

• Career advancements

• Retirement plans

• Personal development goals

When couples set and work towards these goals together, it creates a sense of unity and teamwork. This collaborative approach not only brings couples closer but also gives them a shared purpose and direction.

While it’s important to have common goals, supporting each other’s individual interests…

“Scorekeeping is a useful way to determine winners and losers between opposing teams, but in relationships, both partners should be on the same team.” — Emily Cook, PhD, LCMFT

Healthy, happy relationships are what everyone strives for, but it’s not necessarily always an option. The truth is, some marriages start out amazing and start to struggle a little over time as couples navigate the ups and downs of married life. What that means is it’s time for you and your partner to start looking at what’s going on in your relationship and start making some changes. If you’re already happy and healthy, keeping it that way is a result of working at your marriage and continuing to strive for even better and even more as you go along. You’ll be surprised how great your relationship is.

Talk About the Good

When your partner does something nice for you that you really appreciate or really like, let them know. Don’t just let them flounder wondering if it was good that they did it or bad or indifferent. Remember to thank them and tell them how you felt about it. It’s always good to acknowledge their extra effort especially if your partner does something for you that you know they worked hard on. Even if you didn’t necessarily need them to do it or care if they did, acknowledging the help or the action is going to make them feel more validated and that makes them happier in the relationship.

“It’s not always easy to identify feelings about a situation, but “I” statements can create a foundation for healthier conversation.” — Deanna Richards, LMHC

Talk About the Bad

When your partner does something that you don’t like or there’s something you’d like them to change you need to let them know. Don’t just assume that it’s going to change on its own and don’t just assume that you can live with it. If you let them know they may be able to make some changes that will make you happier. Make sure that you are willing to make some changes for them as well. You don’t want them to be the only one making changes to the relationship. You want them to be happy too and if they feel they’re doing all the changing (or if you do) then no one is going to be happy.

Talk About the Neutral

Make sure you’re telling your partner about the neutral things that happen throughout the day as well. You should want to talk to them about your day and hear about their day. You should talk to them about the minor unimportant things and the big, important ones. Just general conversation is going to keep your relationship healthy and it’s going to make sure that both of you continue to work towards the success of the relationship as well.

“Show your own hand first. Share your vulnerability.” — Bonnie Ray Kennan, PsyD, MFT

Keep Up the Intimacy

It’s not just about having sex, though sex is an important part of your relationship. You also want to make sure that you are just spending time together. Cuddling together or holding hands or just casual touches throughout the day actually help you feel better in your individual life and they improve your relationship as a couple. Make sure you’re continuing to extend the intimacy whenever you can and definitely work on it if it’s not a big part of your life.

 

The best thing that you can do is keep doing what you’re doing right now because that’s how you’re going to continue improving your relationship and making it work even better for you. There’s no reason for you and your partner to start failing in your relationship now when you’re already doing so well. Whenever you have a problem, make sure you’re talking about it and whenever you have something good to say, talk about it too. Keeping open lines of communication is the most important thing in keeping any relationship healthy and happy.

Assuming there is still trouble in paradise, you may seek advice from BetterHelp psychologists. They will help you go through your worries without needing to drive to the therapist’s office.…

 

 

“Don’t underestimate the impact of your physical situation.” — Stan Tatkin Psy.D.

When we were still dating, my boyfriend and now husband of 12 years, were like rabbits. Sex here, sex there, and sex everywhere. No corner in my apartment or his condo was left unblessed by our act of “love,” and he was such a God in the bed, table, chair, floor, and balcony… ok, I’ll stop there. What I want to stress out is that twelve years ago, our physical intimacy was off the roof.

 

Now, if you ask me about our sex life, it’s almost non-existent. We don’t have sex that much anymore and our last “encounter” was I think on my birthday. I became 38 about two months ago. It wasn’t even that good for he had a quickie and I was left wanting for more.

“In our 21st century culture, an intimate relationship that contains good sex is the stated ideal. Yet more than 10 percent of committed couples are having sex with each other only rarely, if at all, and yet consider themselves to be in a happy relationship.” — Isadora Alman MFT, CST

At first, I didn’t mind it. My husband was so pressured at work with his quota and all. I understood him at that time. One week became two and the weeks flew to a month. I would start with my sexy advances, and he’d say – “Oh, I would love to hun, but I’m so tired. Can we do it this weekend?” Of course, I’d say yes and then, the weekend came. Still, there was another reason and then another, and another. He shrugs it off and forgets about the whole thing. I mean, who would intentionally forget about sex?

 

I questioned myself. What is happening here? Is there something wrong? Am I not good enough for him? Does he not find me attractive anymore? Or maybe it’s because I’m too fat? I did gain about 15 pounds after my last delivery. He is not a fan of chubby women, I know that. What he wants is a slim and athletic woman who is not me right now. Or the worse, IS HE HAVING AN AFFAIR?

 

 

My husband doesn’t like confrontations, and in the few instances that I questioned him about something personal, it didn’t end well. I had no one to talk to about my problem, and it was making me anxious. The once happy and jolly me was also very depressed. Once I hit that “something is wrong with me” realization, I made a brilliant move for myself and my marriage. My gut told me to ring a psychiatrist for assistance and I’m so glad that I did it.

“The elusive intimacy we seek doesn’t congeal through the knee jerk reaction of criticizing and attacking our loved ones.” — John Amodeo Ph.D., MFT

She was able to talk me out of overthinking the whole situation, and on doubting myself. I hated all of that when it plagued my weak mind. It made me insecure, and my self-esteem was declining which was a lousy way of handling myself. My shrink told me that I am better than this and if I have a problem with my husband, maybe there are words to say to him that cannot offend, but still communicate how I genuinely feel.

 

I came to my husband on a weekend when he was relaxing on his big Papa Bear chair. My first move was asking him if we can talk. He closed Moby Dick and put down his glasses. He said that yes, he was free to speak with me. After that, I said that I love him very much and that our marriage means the world to me. I proceeded with “I want to tell you something which I hope will come to you as something constructive and repairable. Please don’t judge me and do tell me how you feel about it because I value your feelings.”

 

And so, I told him that I have sexual needs which haven’t been met for months. After a brief explanation from me, my husband held my hand. He said: “I’m so sorry, hun. I promise that I will do better from now on and make an effort to make you feel that you are the most attractive woman in this universe for me.” He kissed me, and you know what happened next.

 

 

It wasn’t always perfect after that. There are days when my husband would take a step back from his promise, but he would work on the issue as soon as he realizes his shortcoming. He also wanted to do a couples counseling thing and that was a good sign for me. At least, he is trying his best.…

“I have come to believe that the real culprit in marriage isn’t the particular problems people bring to therapists, it’s when one or both spouses become hopeless. Hopelessness is the real cancer in marriage.” — Michele Weiner-Davis LCSW

I am fully aware that this site is all about saving your marriage. Don’t get me wrong here. I am all for that. If there is a person in this world that would keep her marriage over and over and over again, well, that’s me. I have tried to save what is left of my abusive marriage, and after 20 years, I think I have done enough saving. People who are abusive to their spouses cannot be saved. That’s what my therapist told me. I cannot save him, and with that, I also cannot save our marriage.…

“Though some may have a slightly different definition of what qualifies as infidelity, most people seem to believe that it involves sexual or physical betrayal.” — Seth Meyers Psy.D.

A cheating incident – or five – throughout the marriage is typically enough for an emotionally tired wife to turn to a psychologist and ask, “Why is this happening to me?”

From what we have heard, there are a few common reasons that can explain why there are a lot of married men who risk the fate of their family and start an illicit affair with someone else. One of them is that the guy may have been influenced by his friends to date another woman behind his wife’s back. Others start to cheat after a drinking incident that has led them to sleep with a female friend or stranger, and then they have somehow kept on doing it. In some cases, the man may be subconsciously addicted to sex; that’s why he cannot stop himself from jumping into someone else’s bed.

None of these reasons sound justifiable enough to forgive a cheater – that is true – especially if it has happened on more than one occasion. Nevertheless, considering you have never been in that situation – and you don’t ever want to be – here are some ideas that every wife should remember to prevent your husband from ever cheating on you.

1. Always Check If You Are Still On The Same Page

The first thing that you should be able to do is to confirm from time to time that your goals and beliefs in life are still similar to one another. If not, then you should at least know what has changed in theirs, and vice versa.

 

It matters to check such aspects regardless of how long you have been together because married couples tend to drift apart when they do not talk about their long-term objectives in front of each other. One may assume that the other has lost interest; that’s why the former might start looking for love elsewhere. If you don’t wish for that to occur, you should make a point of discussing everything that happens in your lives as often as possible.

2. Look After Yourself

As harsh as it may sound, your husband may lose his affection towards you if he notices that you no longer care for your appearance. For instance, you forget to shower your hair for days or sleep in a shirt that your kid has puked on in the morning. Or, after giving birth, you may have sworn off going to the gym to look after the children, but then you stop watching your diet too and end up being as heavy as a whale.

“Some marriages can only be saved with one hundred Zen things; others cannot be saved at all. With this said, a lot of marriages can be saved with a few, relatively minor changes.” — Andrea F. Polard Psy.D.

You may argue that love is blind and that you have promised to stick with one another forever, but the reality is quite different from that. Physical attraction is essential for any couple. In case you let go of yourself like that and presume that your spouse will always be faithful to you no matter how you look, you are practically giving him an excuse to find a more attractive woman. Thus, to avoid that, you should look after yourself all the time.

3. Make Your Husband Feel Special

A married friend came to our house one day because she did not know who else to turn to. Asking what the matter was, she said that her husband was having an affair with his coworker and planning to divorce her. The longer our conversation went on, though, the more I realized that the problem was her. She would act like a princess at home, order the guy to do all the chores, and stop him from even visiting his parents – everything that could suffocate any sane individual, practically speaking.

There’s no way to save that friend’s marriage, but you can prevent such an unfortunate situation by treating your spouse correctly. Instead of making him work alone in the house, split the load equally. When he returns after a hard day at work, make sure that there’s a hot meal waiting for him on the dining table. Do not deprive your husband of sex either and perhaps even initiate it sometimes. If you go out of your way to make him feel loved, he won’t exactly have time to think of other women.

“Even when the couples were monogamous the sharing of fantasies about other people or of escapades from before these two met could make for not only stimulating pillow talk but a sense of enhanced closeness: “See how much I love and trust you.  I prove it by my complete honesty.”” — Isadora Alman MFT, CST

Final Thoughts

The only way to keep your husband from cheating is by giving him no reason to do that. Follow the tips mentioned above, and you will increase the likelihood of staying in a monogamous relationship until death makes you part.

Cheers!…

How many couples do you think come to a therapist’s office every day to try to save their marriage before the relationship becomes irreparable? Similarly, how many married individuals volunteer to get an appointment with a counselor to work on themselves and (hopefully) fix the home that their issues ruined?

It is a little hard to identify the exact number across the globe – and not everyone can openly admit to seeking marriage counseling anyway. However, what we should concern ourselves with more is the fact that couples these days need outside help to repair their relationship, which may have been shaken by cheating, anger management problems, jealousy, et cetera. That is something that our ancestors might laugh at if you suggest it to them during an argument. Issues that occur between family members should get fixed by the family members, after all, or so they used to believe.

“Gaining clarity on what your personal needs are, what your marital needs are as well as how and where to get your needs met has a huge impact on the direction you take in your marriage.” — Susan Pease Gadoua L.C.S.W.

Nevertheless, marriage therapy may not be necessary once you and your spouse think back to the moments that you have experienced together after the wedding.

Why Should You Do That?

The days leading to the actual wedding day tend to be somewhat tricky for the bride-to-be, especially if she refuses to employ the services of a coordinator. That person should have been able to help search for the possible venue, caterer, gown designer, invitation creator, and various things. The upside of making that choice, though, is that you have countless memories of the activities you have done as a couple to bring your dream wedding to fruition.

The rewarding feeling that may engulf both of you once the priest or marriage officiant offers their final blessings and you look at all the well-wishers’ faces is something that troubled couples tend to forget. They try to resolve an issue by saying who’s more at fault instead of forgiving each other and remembering why they got married in the first place. If only you two focus on the latter more, life may once again be harmonious in your household.

Other post-wedding moments you should always keep in mind include:

First Kiss

The first kiss is one of the memories that even aged couples rarely forget. Even though marriage papers need to be registered to make the union official, it is this sweet moment that’s shared by the couple at the end of the ceremony that, for lack of better words, seals the deal.

“When the law says, “You belong. You have the same rights as everyone else,” that has a profound impact on how we view ourselves and each other.” — Mark O’Connell LCSW-R

Customary Dance

There are diverse concepts that brides and grooms wish to see on their unique, yet what creates fun wedding memories is the first dance that you will have with your new spouse. While it is customary, however, the kind of dance that you are going to perform together is not limited to the slow type. Some newlyweds even like to do choreographed dances at present, while others are not afraid of popping and locking in their wedding attire. The only thing that matters is that you can imagine yourself dancing with your life partner until you grow old.

First House

With the assumption that you have lived in separate houses before the marriage, stepping in the first house where you will potentially start your family together as a Mrs. to his Mr. can be a thrilling and enjoyable experience. A lot of thoughts and emotions can race in your mind and heart whenever you look at it, especially if you are yet to fill the empty spaces with furniture and, of course, photos that will always remind you of your happy days. Thus, it is not a bad idea to revisit that place once more with your partner and think of how you can go forward together.

First Pregnancy News

Newlyweds become the happiest when they find out that they are going to have a child a few months after the wedding. The soon-to-be fathers are excited about the possibility of raising a son or a daughter; the first-time mothers feel joyful with the fact that they have a baby growing in their womb. Nonetheless, how the couple feels upon realizing that their love allowed another life to be created.

“I’m certain that if more couples realized that there really is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, they’d be more willing to tough it out through the downpour.” — Michele Weiner-Davis LCSW

Final Thoughts

Keeping the relationship intact may be challenging when terrible circumstances have already rocked your marriage. However, if you have time to quarrel or look for a therapist, you should also have time to relieve the good, old days. Who knows, you may find a happy memory that will stick and make you want to forgive and forget each other’s misgivings.

Good luck!…

What is online couples therapy all about? “Divorce is a tremendous transition that has repercussions for years on both parents and kids. If you can avoid it, why wouldn’t you? “— Susan Pease Gadoua L.C.S.W.

When there are problems in relationships, people generally think of online couple therapy. They think of needing to start working on their problems as partners, but the truth is online therapy for many couples isn’t always the best answer.

There are other types of therapy but here we will focus on  individual therapy and couples online therapy.

Benefits and Importance Of Online Couples Therapy

Is Couples Online Therapy Good To Take It Or You Should Take Individual Therapy?

What you need to do is discover what type of problem you’re really dealing with and afterward, you’ll be able to decide if it’s a ‘you’ problem or a relationship issue.

Then, partners can better assess what type of therapy or counseling will suit their situation best. Or perhaps they would not prefer partner online therapy but go with individual counseling instead.

Couples online therapy has become increasingly popular with the availability of virtual therapy sessions, particularly for those who prefer to attend counseling from the comfort of their own home.

Emotionally Focused Therapy is often used in couples virtual counseling sessions to help partners learn and practice healthy communication skills, build stronger emotional connections, and work through mental health concerns that may be impacting their relationship.

Many virtual treatment platforms accept insurance coverage, making it easier for partners to access therapy without having to worry about the cost. It’s important to check with your health insurance provider to see what kind of coverage they offer for counseling sessions, and to find a couples therapist who accepts insurance to ensure you can receive the support you need to build and maintain healthy relationships.

Weekly sessions are typically recommended for virtual counseling to provide consistency and allow for progress over time.

A kind of treatment done through the use of the internet is “online therapy.”

As most of us know, virtual counseling sessions are a kind of treatment done through the use of the Internet. For partners who are hesitant to try traditional couples counseling, they have the option to try virtual help for marriage.

Online Couples Therapy Benefits

Individual counseling is counseling without your partner. Sometimes, this can be more beneficial than having online relationship counseling.

If you can’t express yourself in front of your partner it may be good for you to get virtual counseling alone first. Individual counseling accessed via a computer helps you get more comfortable with how you’re feeling.

If you don’t believe you’ll be able to do that in such treatment, it’s best to get one-on-one virtual therapy. Perhaps in time, you can try couples online counseling, online counseling, online marriage counseling, online relationship counseling sessions, online couples counseling, premarital counseling, or whatever you want to call this non-traditional therapy that licensed therapists provide.

Couples Online Therapy Helping With Depression And Anxiety

Online therapy has become more accessible with the availability of online therapy platforms. Couples can work with a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship coach, or marriage counselor to receive support and guidance in their relationship.

Some couples online therapy platforms offer a free consultation to help couples determine if virtual counseling is right for them. Imago Relationship Therapy is a popular approach used in couples counseling to help couples improve their communication and develop deeper connections.

Additionally, some couples online therapy platforms offer medication management services and free consultation for couples who require it. These services are incredibly important, especially for couples who experience certain mental health conditions. The sign-up process for online couples treatment is typically straightforward, making it easy for couples to get started with marriage counseling from the comfort of their own home. Trust us, couples online therapy works!

If you have depression or anxiety you may want to have individual counseling via wired access to work through your conditions, but this is one area where your partner could actually be an asset by helping you along.

Your partner’s a huge part of your life, after all. They are not just a part of your relationship. Initially, you may want to look at a mix of partners and individual online counseling to help you through.

If you aren’t sure your healthy relationship issues are right for you or if you are being abused in any way, virtual couples counseling can help you to come to terms with your decisions.

If you don’t want to work as a couple but you do want to improve yourself, the best-wired counseling session can definitely help you instead of in-person couples therapy.

Online Couples Therapy

“Sometimes, those closest to you might notice that things are not right before you do.” — Karen Kleiman MSW, LCSW

Why Choose Couples Online Therapy? Why Not Online Individual Therapy?

If you have a problem directly in your relationships such as trouble with trust or communication, it’s important to work through that problem as partners with licensed marriage and family therapists who offer online therapy services.

I personally prefer to see a family therapist this way because I don’t like to go to in-person sessions, but I still get live video sessions. You can’t improve the communication tools between the two of you entirely on your own.

Make sure you’re working with your partner to build a strong foundation at every therapy session.  Virtual couples therapy sessions will help you open up to each other. In individual or family therapy or in-person therapy sessions, you just can’t do that and get a full picture per session better than online relationship counseling services.

Online couples therapy has become a popular option for couples seeking support in their romantic relationships. Sex therapy, solution-focused therapy, and divorce counseling are all types of therapy that can be accessed online.

Many online couples therapy platforms offer unlimited messaging, providing couples with ongoing support between sessions. Video chat is also commonly used in online treatment to facilitate real-time communication with a licensed therapist.

It’s important to note that therapy costs can vary depending on the platform and type of therapy, so couples should do their research and choose a platform that fits their budget.

Additionally, online treatment may not be appropriate for couples experiencing domestic violence or abuse, as this requires specialized support and intervention.

Couples Online Therapy Reminder

“Fidelity is a choice that you must negotiate regularly to protect your most intimate bond while you both continue to grow as individuals.” — Catherine Aponte Psy.D.

Online Couples Therapy FAQs

What Is The Best Form Of Online Couples Therapy?

How Do You Do Couples Therapy At Home?

What is the success rate of couples’ treatment?
What is the difference between marriage counseling and couples treatment?
Can couples therapy save a …