You’ve exchanged your ‘I Do’s’, but now what? A happy marriage doesn’t just happen. It needs love, respect, trust, understanding, friendship, and faith to make it last. Most importantly, you need to work on it together.
Marital fidelity is typically assumed to be agreed upon once you take your marriage vows at the wedding and is sanctified by most religions. — Catherine Aponte Psy.D.
They say one of the best things in life is finding your “the one.” The only thing better than that is when you get to spend the rest of your life together. That’s exactly how marriage works. Marriage is a special bond. It is a commitment to life where two people pledge their love for each other and promise to bring out the best in each other, no matter how hard it gets.
For a newlywed couple, they experience the honeymoon stage as soon as the wedding ends. According to TripSavvy, the phase normally soars during the honeymoon, when a couple has the time and desire to completely focus on one another. In the said phase, togetherness, love, affection and frequent sex become the hallmarks. However, nothing lasts forever. Not even this honeymoon phase. So, here’s what newlyweds need to do to build a strong foundation for their marriage:
Prenups can be positive in that they get couples talking about what they want from the marriage: The betrothed need to make sure they want the same things (i.e. children or no children), and they need to talk about family, finances and fallout if the marriage doesn’t last. — Susan Pease Gadoua L.C.S.W.
Make sure there’s an open communication.
Your lover is your best friend. You should have no problem having free and open conversations with him or her. Share your most private thoughts, your worries, feelings and difficulties. You’d be surprised at how life would be more bearable by having a partner to share it with. Of course, when things get rough, try to lower your pride and extend your understanding by listening attentively to your partner. You don’t want to lose your temper so easily if you’re staying with your beau for a lifetime.
Respect and appreciate your different interests.
As you live with your partner, you’d find out many things about him or her that you don’t really know beforehand. While it’s important to share interests with your spouse, APlus revealed that it’s better to acknowledge the differences. Let them do what they love (as long as it’s not illegal and harmful in any way). If your wife loves operas, even if you think it’s boring to death, let her attend one with her friends who loves it just as much as she does. Or if you want to go the extra mile, surprise her by being her company for the night.
If you can’t decide which side of the fence you favor, it’s probably time to honestly and nakedly assess your relationship, including the viability of monogamy. — Linda Esposito LCSW
Set aside time to bond with each other’s families.
When you marry someone, you’re not just marrying your partner. You’re also making a promise to their family. Befriend them because you’re part of the family now. Spend time with them doing fun activities. Have lunch together or simply ask how their lives are going. This one is particularly challenging. But, you need to invest time and effort to build a lasting and cordial relationship with the most important group in your life. It’s a gift to your spouse when you blend in well the family, even very special friends.
Plan your financial goals.
Talk about your goals, visions and how you’d want your family to be. You may have spent a hefty price for your wedding. So maybe now, you may want to work on saving up and investing money for your kids. List down your assets and savings and determine how much you should set aside to be used for particular expenses. Forbes suggested three kinds of financial goals: emergency fund (3-6 months of essential bills), travel fund (1 to 5 year goal), and long term funding (child’s education and retirement).
Marriage is a long-term commitment. But as long as you’ve built the foundation, you can work your way to keeping it strong for the years to come. “‘Till death do us part,” isn’t it?